In this post, you’ll see how I “mash up” lessons learned from Vince Lombardi and my high school basketball coach. Together, they form an idea we follow in Asking Formula workshops: Practicing and Simulating.
You see, it’s not just what you practice to get good at something (for example, asking for what you want), but also how you go through that practice: who will be present? Do you have a time constraint? What “tell” does your audience have you would recognize?
No matter your word scrutiny or suave demeanor in an asking situation, you’re never fully prepared without simulating the opportunity beforehand.
“You seemed aggressive. You sounded arrogant and condescending. You kind of creeped me out… You really aren’t sure you deserve what you are asking for.”
Sounds awkward to hear, if it’s directed toward you, right?
How would you react to hearing this feedback, after you’ve role-played your “ask” in a workshop? (I frequently ask workshop participants to role-play, because practice is underestimated, and not met with much enthusiasm… but it’s essential to improving your skills.)
I always say that asking is simple… but it’s not easy.
That’s why we spend so much time role playing The Asking Formula during our workshops.
As so many people realize: something we are *so sure* we think we can do after listening to a speaker or reading a book… becomes suddenly complex and frustrating when we actually put it into practice.
I’ve seen thousands of examples, through workshops and ASK U, where people sabotage their message by not practicing what they’ve learned; instead, they lean on existing bad habits. Watch these 3 tips to non-verbal asking I developed, after witnessing such examples.