I always say that asking is simple… but it’s not easy.
That’s why we spend so much time role playing The Asking Formula during our workshops.
As so many people realize: something we are *so sure* we think we can do after listening to a speaker or reading a book… becomes suddenly complex and frustrating when we actually put it into practice.
I’ve seen thousands of examples, through workshops and ASK U, where people sabotage their message by not practicing what they’ve learned; instead, they lean on existing bad habits. Watch these 3 tips to non-verbal asking I developed, after witnessing such examples.
What I mean by that is that the typical “who, what, when, where, why” approach doesn’t gain much in terms of insight. Honestly, when is the last time you actually learned the truth about someone by asking them these types of questions?
The key to discovering someone’s true motivation or character is: the follow-up question. It is politely, but firmly, asking your audience to build on their prior answer… to go deeper and be more authentic in their response.
Summer is here and we’re heading into a holiday weekend. Let’s make this brief.
In his weekly blog, “The Sunday Snippet,” John Stevenson writes about the importance of observing of what he calls a 3:30:3 rule. Here’s what he has to say:
“The 3:30:3 rule works like this: You must earn an audience’s interest in the first three seconds. Do you have something meaningful to say, and do you have a useful solution to my problem?
If you are successful in the first few seconds, they will most likely grant you another 30 seconds.
Assuming you’ve been on target so far, your prospect will now grant you three more minutes to make your case.”
Stevenson’s firm, Client Kudos, creates stories that gain attention and engage audiences in fresh ways. His 3:30:3 rule is proven to work with written communications, but is equally powerful to keep in mind when you are asking for what you want.
Directly asking for what you want gets your audience squarely focused on solutions in the first few moments of the conversation. It cuts through clutter and static. It differentiates you from others who spend too much time and provide too much information trying to get to their point.
The number one constraint in people’s lives is TIME. When asking for what you want, use The Asking Formula – and the 3:30:3 Rule – as a way to make the most of your and your audience’s time.